Planning

Next interview planning

So, as I mentioned previously, I am currently in the process of interviewing Mitch Dworet, the father of Nick and Alex Dworet. I wanted to write some questions that would help me in my process and here's what I came up with. I know just based off of my own creative style, this will of course change slightly depending on what he says, but this is for me to go off of. 

1. What is your name and affiliation within the MSD shooting?

2. Can you tell me about who your son was and what his beliefs/values are

3. What was the day of the shooting like for you? (if you're comfortable ofc)

4. What has the process of grief been like for you?

5. Why is recovery such a complex process?

6. Can you touch on survivor's guilt/prolonged grief? What does that mean to you?

7. Moving forward, how have you been able to push through this grief and honor your son rather than allow his name to be forgotten? 

So these are my main questions I want to ask. Within Broll, I had previously talked to Mitch about my opportunities there and he stated he wasn't very comfortable with us taking footage in their house so I'm going to utilize photos I can find of him online/ones that are sent to me...

Here are some I have found online that I think might work:

       

   

So as you can see here, I feel as though these pictures are a nice perspective on who Nicholas was as a person. My plan for these images is to do a slight fade and utilize a gaussian blur in the background.
I also plan on using a slight vignette to add to the aesthetics and theme of my docuseries.



Also, I want to film my interview in front of this picture in their dining area, which shows a beach. This beach was actually the one his son always dreamed of swimming in, so I feel as though it would mean a lot for Mitch to show this in the shot. Also, if we film that way there's a picture of Nicholas that he can look at during the interview.


I am really excited for this interview, which I will be filming in the upcoming weeks. I'll update you soon

Until next time

- Emma <3

Social Media Page

     Becoming a micro-influencer.... Or so I hope

So I believe I have already slightly mentioned my process however I've started posting to social media! So originally I had talked to my Aice Media teacher about wanting to have a memorial-like posting where I honored each person who passed during the MSD shooting and slowly worked on content that establishes my documentary purpose. My first post was made on the 7th memorial. I'll attach that below so you can see... 

So I wanted to really work with my brand colors and show why I decided on this specific brand. So as my documentary name "As Your Life Turns to Ashes" asserts this documentary is about loss and grief. Even though it was awfully convenient the Stoneman Douglas colors are maroon and black I honestly really liked these colors overall to symbolize loss and grief. Aside from just doing this post the day of however I knew I needed to do more. 

Something really important to me is keeping everything congruent so my main font styles for this project are Alex Brush and Lovelace Text on Canva. On that note, I have actually been using Canva for all of my blog posts. And I mean all of them. I love having learned how to use this program so efficiently because honestly, it makes social media design so much faster. After moving on from this post I wanted to create posts every day (or at least try to post every day) of pictures/memorials of each life lost that day. Once I move on to other episodes within the series I'll move on to posting about them but for right now those 17 individuals will be posted. I maintained a template to use for each of the individuals

so everything looks the same and also so I only have to change their name, birthdate/death date as well as their picture. This is what the templates look like and I've been working to post every single day. Based off of my schedule I shouldddd be on day 11 of these posts but I'll be honest to say two days just weren't my friend. That being said I am happy with the engagement I am getting with these posts. Of course, I'm not exactly a celebrity but anyone I have shared this with has reacted in a positive way.

 Also in a more human aspect honestly being able to make these captions with their stories has put things into perspective for me. For example, Nicholas Dworet was about to graduate from high school. He was 17 years old, just like me, and this just really hurt my heart to think about. He had so much potential and strived for positive influences and so his being lost that day is really devastating. His father, Mitch actually talked with me at the memorial and I am working to schedule an interview so that we can go a little deeper. His main commitment in life is to face his grief of losing his son while inspiring others with this. 

Nonetheless, if you'd like to check out my Instagram account you can look it up @whenyourlifeturnstoashes. 

I think that is all I have for you today but 

Until next time 

- Emma <3

Genre Research

 Interview research 

Troughout this topic of documentary, it's not only important to research through watching other documentaries but just learn more about this topic so that during interviews I sound knowledgeable. The first topic I really wanted to research was the topic of survival guilt as well as prolonged grief.

Let's start with some definitions: 

According to Oxford's English Dictionary survivor guilt is "a condition of persistent mental and emotional stress experienced by someone who has survived an incident in which others died." This was an issue that many individuals who survived the MSD shooting faced. In my interview with Rylan, she mentioned her best friend who unfortunately took her life due to survivor's guilt. This is something that people can overcome however it takes many years of therapy and recovery. 

The other term that is commonly mentioned within my conversations I wanted to familiarize myself with is prolonged grief. The DSM-5-TR (diagnostic tag) criteria for PGD requires that an individual has distressing symptoms of grief for at least 12 months following the loss of a close attachment and that the grief response is characterized by intense longing/yearning for the deceased person. An example of someone who suffers from prolonged grief is Mitch Dworet who within our conversations actually mentioned this phrase to me and discussed how most individuals who lost a family member that day are now diagnosed with this disorder. 

I also decided to look into news articles from different parents and friends to identify good subjects to talk to. I had actually done this before going to the memorial as well to see if I could find these individuals at this event and find someone who specifically focuses on grief like Mitch does. 

So like I had said this week I plan on going through my b roll from the memorial as well as beginning the structure with the interview I have received. I need to work with my other two interview subjects to create a good time to film those interviews. Also!!! It's really far-fetched and probably not going to happen but I may have a fourth interview with Dara Hass who was in the English classroom at the time of the shooting. I'm not sure if she will be comfortable but I am working with her to possibly film a brief interview 

But honestly, I have my work cut out for me so

Until next time 

- Emma <3

Research...

 You can't make a documentary without some research first... 

So as I mentioned in my last vlog... yeah lots and lots and lots of research. Currently, the main thing I'm researching is the topic of prolonged grief as well as documentaries within the same genre. 

Last night I was able to take some time and watch the documentary "Bowling for Columbine". This was the first documentary that discussed a similar topic as it was a political one that explores the circumstances that led to the 1999 Columbine High School massacre as well as homicide rates. While this piece focused more on the context of gun violence and mine will focus on grief I felt that it would still be a strong example of what I'd like this piece to become. Moore was actually thought to have a very controversial piece due to bias which is something I recognize going into it that "When Your Life Turns to Ashes" might slightly relate to. I plan to take myself out of this documentary to my best effort however that can be difficult when discussing a mass shooting.  

Some of the technical elements I recognized within this film that I would like to utilize in my piece include archived footage like videos or pictures before this happened, interviews with family or survivors, and music. As much as the piece utilizes graphics I decided that with my own personal outlook, I don't think this piece needs to use them. 

One of the only aspects of this documentary I didn't like was the use of humor in the piece. Whilst I do agree that creating a documentary like this may be nice to lighten the mood to me it just merely feels insincere to their grief and loss.

Another documentary I found to be helpful was "The Trials of Amanda Knox." This documentary was a true crime one that discussed the trial of Amanda Knox for the murder of her roommate. While the context of this film is entirely different from mine I found that this piece was incredibly helpful in terms of understanding how to structure a documentary. In terms of my own documentary, I'm having a difficult time structuring the film in a way that would make sense to an audience. That being said, the use of flashbacks and interviews in "The Trials of Amanda Knox" was incredibly helpful. I really liked how the directors utilized flashbacks to show the audience what happened that night and then used interviews to show the different perspectives of the individuals involved. I think this would be a great way to structure my own documentary as I could use interviews to showcase the different perspectives of the individuals I interviewed and use flashbacks to show the audience what happened on February 14th.

In terms of the technical elements used in this film, I really enjoyed the use of music. I felt that the music used in this film was very suspenseful and kept the audience on the edge of their seats. This is something I would definitely like to incorporate into my own documentary as I feel that music is a powerful tool that can be used to evoke emotion. I also liked the use of interviews in this film. The interviews were very well done and they provided a lot of insight into the case. I think this is something that I would like to focus on in my own documentary as well.

But that's all for me today! 

Until Next time 

- Emma <3

Memorial/interview updates

February 14th update      

Hey so it's been a minute but to be honest, I've been crazy busy with life recently. I feel like lots has been going on the last week though I need to update you about it. 

Let's start with the interview... 

So as I said I interviewed with Rylan Knox on the 12th. Within this interview, I really wanted to focus on the beginning parts of my structure in her experience that day and the feeling of loss. One of the main reasons I decided to focus on the beginning structure with her was because I really felt like she wanted to share her story. That's in contrast to one of my other interview subjects Mitch Dworet who I'll reference later. So back to Rylan, within this interview, she detailed her experience that day and how loss felt to her. She also went into a bit of grief and how she overcame these emotions through yoga. I was really upset because about 20 minutes through her interview we were interrupted as a class was about to take place in the room we conducted the interview in however so I didn't get to be as thorough as I would've loved to be with her. Nonetheless, I felt as though this was a really incredible interview and that overall Rylan is an incredible girl. It really honestly put life into perspective for me that just 7 years ago she was the same age as me, with the same personality and life, and in a click like that her life changed indefinitely. I'd be lying if I said I didn't feel some pretty strong emotions during this interview but honestly I feel like that made the two of us connect on a deeper level. 

Since I finished her interview now and still need to get at least two more I decided that in order to manage my time wisely I would start the process of structuring where I'd like to put certain things she said. Someone who is helping me in the documentary process Oriana Rangel gave me the idea to actually transcribe the interview and put it into a document to structure it rather than watch the video over and over again and honestly, it's working really well for me. The first step of that was to of course transcribe and read it and now I'm beginning the process of highlighting keywords and parts of her interview I think would be essential to the purpose I'm trying to get across. 

So thats an update on the interview that was conducted now let's discuss all the work I did this weekend in context to filming Broll... 

As I've established the MSD shooting happened on February 14th so every year Eagles Haven, a grief and recovery center I've been in close contact with, hosts a memorial service where family and friends can come to speak on behalf of the 17 lives lost and honor those individuals. This memorial showcased a dove flight which you can see to the left, speeches from each of the family members, a candle lighting ceremony, and activities that the lives lost loved. The main purpose of me going to this event was to learn more about this topic whilst filming footage that showcases both grief and perserverance. I was grateful to have the opportunity to go and film the event as well as speak with other individuals who may have a connection within this community. Within these conversations, I was able to talk to Mitch Dworet father of Alexander Dworet (freshman at the time) and Nicholas Dworet (senior at the time). Mitch and I had a long conversation about the concept of grief as both of his sons were affected by the MSD shooting. Unfortunately, Mitch's older son Nicholas was taken that day and Alex was injured so he has had a difficult time these last 7 years recovering from this tragedy. That being said, when I initially began discussing a documentary with him he was extremely reluctant. He had a conversation with me entirely summed to - he didn't want to talk about the day. However, through our conversation, we realized that we had a common mission to help others who suffer from grief find methods of perseverance. Because of this Mitch agreed to give me his number so we could schedule an interview at a later time. 

I also connected with Eagles Haven to schedule an interview with Lindsay Carpenter who is the project coordinator in charge of all major events like the memorial and grief resources for those who have suffered from loss. I wanted to slow down with these other two interviews as I want to take my time with this project so I gave both of these individuals my schedule so we can find a comfortable time for all parties. Now a documentary is a lot of work to do on your own so I would love to give credit to my wonderful boyfriend Lucas who helped me at the memorial as well as my friend Oriana who plans on helping with the interviews, structure, and editing process. Honestly as cheesy as this may sound I really feel like this was my fate to share this story so I'm very happy that I have been given the opportunity to do so. 

Last thing I want to update you on is the amount of research this documentary is taking. Tomorrow I'm going to write a blog more about that but just for some context... I currently have 32 different news articles open on my computer to read more about literally everything in relation to grief specifically the grief of those who lost a life to gun violence. But yeah this topic is definitely very heavy. I really hope this becomes a resource for individuals who suffer from this sitution and I'm glad I can share this. 

But well, 

Until next time

- Emma <3

Outline & Structure

     So I met with Mrs. Stoklosa today (my aice media teacher) and we fully talked for about 30 minutes about everything to do with this documentary. The school shooting at Stoneman Douglas happened... 2 days from now 7 years ago and it's been a crazy week of emotions and research. I honestly changed my concept within this overarching topic a lot. Whilst I really resonate with the concept of the survival guilt expecially in regards to Sydney Aiello, I realize that this is a really difficult topic for many to discuss in their interviews. Because of all of this I pretty much landed on the concept to not focus on what happened the day of the shooting but rather how individuals cope with grief and what they do with those emotions. 

So the structure would go as follows

1. Stoneman douglas shooting backstory 

2. Loss and who was lost that day

3. Grief 

4. What we do with grief/moving on

Since the portfolio project is only a 5 minute excerpt from the piece I decided that in creating this documentary I really want to focus on the last 5 minutes. I actually got to speak to one of the parents who lost his child (Nicholas Dworet). Nicholas was actually a 17-year-old Olympic swimmer who tragically lost his life on that horrific day. Speaking with his father he loved the concept of speaking of grief and how he resonates with that emotion. He shared with me his personal story of grief and I am now working on setting up an interview with him. 

Also I realize that filming this documentary can be really hard so I have done a lot of prior research into the individuals before their interviews to understand their situation a little more deeply and see what to avoid asking. 

On another note I actually got to film one of my interviews and it went really well. I am really happy with it (even though we got cut off a bit towards the end I think it went well). I'm getting ready to film Broll at the memorial and so I've begun writing a broll list of things I'd like to include. 

Some of these things include 

- Dove launching 

- Candle Lighting ceremony 

- Booths in memorial 

- Family members 

- Speeches/stories 

- EMOTIONSSSSSS 

I'm really honored to be able to work on this project and really want this to be perfect (or as close as I can get)

But well I plan on updating you after the ceremony on how things go and share some footage I get. 

Until Next Time 

- Emma ♡

Project schedule

Desired Accomplishments...

Of course, this project is definitely something I'm passionate about but let's be honest, second-semester senior year... We need a schedule to stay on track. 

If you are not already aware of this Stoneman Douglas was a school shooting that happened on February 14th, 2018. Which is in... 3 days. So to get broll of memorials and how individuals are honored I need to pick up the pace in filming and getting things ready. So literally within the first day of choosing this topic, I already contacted a girl to set up an interview. (I wasn't kidding when I said I was excited) her interview is scheduled for tomorrow the 12th. The girl I am interviewing' name is Rylan Knox. She was best friends with both Sydney Aiello and Meadow Pollack so she has really struggled with her mental health ever since. Both she and Sydney worked to get over their PTSD through yoga and unfortunately one of them got through it and one of them did not. Due to Sydeny and Rylan being such close friends I feel as though she will have very good insight on Sydenys emotions and how the shooting really affected both of them. 

I digress, let's plan the schedule for the next few weeks...

This gets me to the end of feburary.. So what you can see here is my schedule for the next three weeks. I know it looks very.... colorful but I'll explain why. As I said in my last blog, I want to focus on the feeling of survivals guilt specifically in the first documentary episode regarding to stoneman douglas. That being said I wanted to do a social media series where I feature all 17 individuals and honor them and their families by describing who they were as individuals and what their families are doing with their grief. Unfortuantely many who lose their families suffer from PTSD and as I said survivals guilt so I felt that by featuring each individual on a specific day and describing the incredible individuals they are fit within the genre and feeling of this documentary.  

After Feburary ends I'd have a total of 6 weeks left... So heres my checklist for what I need to get done in those final six weeks

1. I need to finish the posts for the 17 individuals and begin to segway the social media to focus on the Texas elementary school shooting - the next episode of my documentary

2. I need to begin the post production process and start editing my documentary

3. I need to finalize the social media & magazine article 

4. I need to write my critical reflection 

I feel like if I stay on track because a lot of the filming is happening this week (so excited I got this (ish)) I can definetly finish on time. With filming the majority of the broll this friday and even having an interview done before the week is over it's definetly plausible.

Thats all for me now 

Until next time 

- Emma <3

Its been a minute..

Next big thing... 

Now that we are officially done with all the preliminary projects we have for Aice Media A level we are moving on to something bigger. Since we last wrote in this blog we have been very busy in our class. The last project we did was create a distribution and marketing plan for an upcoming movie written by our schools creative writing class. Part of this project included creating a movie trailer, a teaser, and a print document to publicize the film.

Here is a brief summary of the film: Juan Antonio Casas, nicknamed Juanto, finds himself in a whirlwind 48 hours after his roommate Felipe Barboza mysteriously disappears. After discovering a ransom note demanding $315,000 for Felipe's safe return, Juanto embarks on a frantic investigation through New York City. He navigates through police stations, and Felipe's school, and eventually uncovers Felipe's deep debt to a loan shark. Juanto works with a detective to set a trap, ultimately exposing Felipe's staged disappearance. Felipe and the loan shark are arrested, leaving Juanto searching for a new roommate.

I'm honestly really happy with how this film turned out. Here is a link to my trailer, teaser, and print document if you'd like to check them out! :)
 

But now that our project is over we're finally starting our portfolio project.

I seriously don't think I have ever been so excited to start a project in this class because I finally feel excited to create and genuinely I don't think I've felt so passionate about a project in a long time. This brings forth the first decision, which project should I choose to complete. Throughout my four years of high school, I have always been interested in journalism and telling others stories so I instantly landed in completing the documentary package. 

    Within the past few months, I have been really considering what content I want my documentary to share. At first, my interest was in foster care and discussing the different impacts of the foster care system on others and the detrimental impact being separated from a parent can bring. I liked this concept because, in terms of an episodic documentary series, I felt the issue of children losing their parents could include things such as the passing away at a young age, foster care, and more topics. I've always been really passionate about foster care but due to the inability to get a concrete b roll in foster children, I decided to move on from that concept to something tremendously different. 

    I compete in a television competition called STN where we practice every Saturday to make a news magazine in 8 hours. So through that, I make a news package every Saturday in which I meet a lot of people who really help me to make connections in my community. When at the Challenge Air event helping disabled children learn how to fly planes, however, one person really stuck out to me more than any have before. There was a table for one of the children who passed away in Stoman Douglas: Gina Rose Montalto although I wasn't able to interview him for the package I was currently working on that man really stuck with me. He shared how his daughter loved working with Challenge Air and was only 14 years old which got me thinking, we talk about the person who has passed away but never the people still alive afterward. 

    I did a lot of research and that's when I found her. Sydney Aiello. A survivor of the tragic massacre who was so guilty of surviving she took her own life just a year afterward. I have already started doing a lot of research (if I'm being honest the second I started this project I really couldn't stop). So I honestly stalked a lottt of Instagram accounts and websites and photos and news articles and I found SO. MUCH. INFORMATION. Firstly I found out how Sydney was best friends with a girl named Meadow Pollack who was shot in Stoneman Douglas. Ever since then, she suffered from survival guilt and PTSD from what had happened. She tried to recover from this grief but it was just too much for her and she lost the fight the same way her best friend did. 

    This is a really heavy topic but I'm honestly so passionate and excited to see how this documentary comes out. 

    

    Until next time 

- Emma <3